For Paul, kindness is not politeness. It’s a weapon in spiritual warfare. We teach and rebuke with kindness and gentleness, so that “God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth, and they may … escape from the snare of the devil, after bring capture by him to do his will” (2 Tim. 2:25–26).
Onward p. 191
Kindness and gentleness are not milquetoast. Kindness is thinking about the other person as an image bearer and treating them as such. To be gentle or meek means not being overly impressed with one’s sense of self-importance. It allows us to focus on the other. And it allows us to remain in the truth, not caring for our own reputation or how others think of us. It allows us to not be concerned about winning. We don’t teach to impress but to reveal the glory of God: his abundant lovingkindness and truth.
Lingering Over Leaves 